Electronic Etiquette:
Keeping the Human Element in Communication

by Ronna Archbold

It is the era of enhanced communication. Electronic gadgets are everywhere. Ringing golf bags and attache cases. Car phones that chirp. Facsimile machines that beep and spew forth reams of paper. Digitization that brings instant pictures onto our computer screens from the sender who doesn't have time for the thousand words.

There are telephone convenience options of answering machines, call waiting, conference calling, and voice mail. "Electronic humans" answer the phone for corporations and act as menus so you become the switchboard operator. And there is the information superhighway, complete with Internet, e-mail and incredible opportunities to "talk" around the world.

With all of these choices the need to be considerate is crucial. Electronic communication is immediate, but devoid of body language and the human element. It is all to easy to be impolite because we are tricked into thinking we are just talking to a gadget. But although it is through an impersonal channel, ultimately we are talking to each other.

Here are some ways to be and not to be in the electronic-communication arena:
In a recent episode in Los Angeles, where Judge Lance Ito was presiding over "the trial of the century," we heard rings of rudeness. In the midst of pretrial hearings for O.J. Simpson, defense attorney Robert Shapiro's mobile telephone pierced the sanctity of the courtroom. Judge Ito attempted to ignore the first call. But when the phone rang a second time, the judge was quick and firm. He let Shapiro know that if it happened one more time, he would confiscate the next noisy gadget.

Ringing golf bags, briefcases, purses, and tuxedo cummerbunds are equally as tasteless as the incidents in Judge Ito's courtroom. A remedy is a device that vibrates rather than making intrusive sounds.

A lengthy conversation from a car telephone can be hazardous to the driver and those who share the road. It can also be frustrating to the recipient because it is difficult to carry on a conversation with someone whose voice crackles and fades.

One way of handling the cellular telephone is illustrated by a friend of mine. He is continually on location doing his space/interior planning for corporations. His customers can always reach him on his cellular phone, but they soon learn--and appreciate--that he will quickly make arrangements to return their call from an office phone or a payphone. This way, their conversation can be private, less expensive, and not interrupted by breaks and blackouts.

The purpose of most of the electronic-communication devices is to give us the opportunity to make an appointment or leave a short message. This saves both parties time and facilitates a more substantive communication later on. Think in terms of contact rather than content. Of course, use your judgment on this one. When leaving a message on an answering machine or voice mail, including a little content can help avoid a game of phone tag.

Facsimile machines are the best thing since printing was invented. However, when we receive unsolicited materials or are faxed fifteen pages of text that could have been sent through the mail, we become incensed. This is careless use of a tool that should be reserved for the document that needs immediate attention. Paper is wasted and runs out. The machine is rendered useless for an important missive that couldn't get through due to a busy signal or an empty paper roll. If you need to fax more than a few pages, it is best to call ahead so that you may send them through at a time that is convenient. And one more tip: It is good business practice to acknowledge the receipt of a fax by placing a quick call to the sender.

What about the old-fashioned thank you note? Sending one on a fax machine is not savvy or thoughtful. It should not cost the receiver time, paper, and sometimes telephone charges to receive your thanks. The thank you note is still most welcome when it is either typed or handwritten and sent through the mail.

Cyberspace communication does not
substitute for human communication.
Answering machines are great tools, when used to their best advantage. When you leave a message, you should give the date and hour you called, and advise as to the best time for the call to be returned. Try to state the purpose of your call. Always include a telephone number with area code. This should be done at a speed that allows the listener to comprehend without having to replay the message to make sense of your "fast forward" delivery. Never assume that people have your telephone number. They may indeed have it--back in the office, or in a date book that is not with them. It is a pleasure not to have to hunt for a number. Hence your call has a much better chance of being returned if you provide this information.

Call waiting--or should we say, "call interrupting"?--is both a blessing and a curse. Fortunately if you are the one calling, you can deactivate it for a charge generally by touching *70 or dialing 1170 before placing the call. When you are not the caller, alert the person calling you that you have call waiting and that you are expecting a call. Then you can negotiate how to handle it. You could offer to call back after your call is received or continue talking. If the call comes through, at that point you can say, "Let me call you back so we can have this conversation uninterrupted."

While the matter of common courtesy is sufficient reason to change some of our habits surrounding the use of our phones, faxes, and e-mail, there is yet another issue: privacy. An article in The Wall Street Journal, February 28, 1995, "Is Office Voice Mail Private? Don't Bet On It" is well worth a read. One of the examples cited is a recent case in which a state court judge in California upheld the firing of two systems administrators at a Nissan subsidiary. Their e-mail and electronic messages had been denigrating to their supervisor. He intercepted their notes and they were let go. The judge ruled that the company did have the right to read, intercept and do whatever with the e-mail because it owns and operates the equipment!

We should stand warned by the above incident. Other things to bear in mind are the fact that we never know who may be listening to the message as we are leaving it, and the fact that our cell and portable phones use radio frequencies that can be picked up by anyone with a receiver. All this should give us further incentive to employ these great new communication tools with care.

Call waiting--or should we say, "call interrupting"?
--is both a blessing and a curse.

Although such legal concerns are serious in the use of the information highway, it is the little day-to-day usage that can cause personal misunderstandings and irritation. For example, to communicate in all caps is equivalent of shouting--not an appropriate professional expression. When using the Internets, always remember that an intelligent, emotional human being is the recipient of your message.

The etiquette rules are in the process of being written as the use of e-mail increases. To be au courant on the subject of proper etiquette on the e-mail, try to read the column in the journal Wired, aptly titled, "Netiquette." Another good source is A Primer on How to Work With the USENET Community by Cuq Von Rospach. It is a six-page document that he has declared public domain. In it, he gives "common sense" courtesies for using the Internet.

Von Rospach points out some other thoughtless electronic business protocol no-nos: putting people on speaker phone without their permission, recording a call without the speaker's knowledge (illegal in some states), calling a cellular telephone excessively, not returning a call within a reasonable length of time, sending fax material with no header (illegal in some states), and faxing material that is of a confidential nature.

At their present state of development, cellular telephones and fax machines are really intended only for a quick exchange of information. They set the stage for the voice-to-voice or face-to-face communication. They do not take the place of the personal meeting, the letter with supporting details, or the interactive conversation. In many instances, facsimile sheets are not acceptable as a substitute for the original for legal or accounting purposes.

When "XX'' and "OO" are written at the end of a love note, they are merely a shorthand for affection; they could never take the place of the real thing. By the same token, cyberspace communication does not substitute for human interaction.

Ronna Archbold is the electronic publishing sales manager for the East Coast and the federal government for Reed Reference Publishing. Ms. Archbold consults, writes and trains in the field of protocol and sales.